I feel like in our world that we inhabit – you either are one or the other. And each side has its judgments of the other.
And there is always a comparison going – Who does it better???
UGH
Growing up in the ’90s and early 00’s, the primary goals of my schools were to teach us how to be a good Jew, a good Woman and eventual Mom, and to choose from a few appropriate professions.
Because the prevailing thought and opinion of the time was that – a good Jewish Woman has a home and family which comes first; therefore, a teaching, secretarial or Rebbetzin (wife of a Rabbi) position were acceptable.
Then I graduated school and thought I had life set!
My dream at the time:
- I was going to teach/ work for non for profit
- Get married young
- Have a ton of kids
- Move somewhere crazy and have a Chabad house (where my husband would be the Rabbi)
~What actually happened:
- I got married at the ripe old age of 23 (
) - Hubby and I run our own businesses
- We have one daughter and struggle with secondary infertility
I never thought that I would be contemplating the life of a CEO vs being a stay-at-home mom.
Now, before these words trigger anyone in any way (hmmm)…. Just wait… I’m not negating or agreeing. Just stating what was.
So here’s my opinion and thoughts – based on my experience (which at the end of the day – it’s my blog so that’s what I’m sharing 
).
First of all – we all do what is best for our families.
Sometimes it’s the mom that stays home and sometimes it’s the dad – so whichever – it all works.
I don’t believe there is one way or the other – there are so many good things for a kid to see from a SAHM or one that has a JOB.
I also realized that for the longest time I was seeking outside validation when really I had to validate me to myself and be a little more grateful!
What I came up with that works for me – is part CEO and part SAHM !
This offers the benefits of my daughter watching her parents hustle – hopefully, she’ll grow up to respect the hustle and recognize hard work as being important. When we talk about vacations or ‘extras’ in life – we speak about how we both work to make that happen.
Asaf (my husband) and I got married and started building a Real Estate business together right away. The grit, the exhaustion, the messiness – can take a few years before things ‘settle’ down. And even then, there are always things that come up that need our attention. That is what happens when a person is self-employed. But I would never give that up – running a business is not for everyone.
Asaf (my husband) and I got married and started building a Real Estate business together right away. The grit, the exhaustion, the messiness – can take a few years before things ‘settle’ down. And even then, there are always things that come up that need our attention. That is what happens when a person is self-employed. But I would never give that up – running a business is not for everyone.
Benefits of being a stay at home mom
If my daughter is sick, or needs to go to school late, or needs to go to the doctor. I’m available.
And I do think that if it’s feasible – for us it’s important that one parent is available to connect and be with Leah our daughter. After all – we only have a few more years until she no longer needs me in the same way. Now – she still needs me to put her to bed, do homework with her or give her that minute-to-minute attention.
Now, our daughter is 8, so during the school day I’m ‘free’. Meaning that Leah’s not home and I can focus on work and home. So this is what we figured out that works for us.
I run two businesses and my goal is to keep them part-time for now, at least for the next couple of years. I don’t want them to explode but rather to have a gradual growth because that’s what works for us. It enables me to have the flexibility to be available for our daughter and to take care of our home (like keeping it clean, laundry, groceries, cooking, and the millions of other things it takes to run a home) and to feel fulfilled with work that I thoroughly enjoy.
I recognize and am grateful that part of the reason it works is because Asaf and I built a business together (that I am not as involved in anymore – because we have an amazing team). But I also have stopped being so hard on myself for not allowing my businesses to explode because when they did it got too overwhelming for my family.
I recognize and am grateful that part of the reason it works is because Asaf and I built a business together (that I am not as involved in anymore – because we have an amazing team). But I also have stopped being so hard on myself for not allowing my businesses to explode because when they did it got too overwhelming for my family.
One day they will and it’s going to be amazing.
Right now… I’m a part-time CEO, SAHM, and full-time Wife and Mom.
Who says you can’t do anything halfway – just kidding.
It really depends on what your goals and wants are
When those are clear, then everything else makes sense and you no longer have frustrations (at least for that specific thing)
In health
Zelda
