When I first started working after Leah was born – I encountered guilt within myself.
I shouldn’t work.
I should be a stay-at-home mom – like my mother and grandmother because that’s what good moms do.
And truth is that for the most part, I enjoyed being at home with Leah.
I needed a Flexible Schedule
I was part-time helping Asaf out with some of his real estate work but I didn’t enjoy it (annoying admin and bookkeeping 
stuff).
And so I started looking into careers that would enable me to be flexible with Leah’s schedule.
I started teaching again part time and did for four years until we moved from Long Island to Brooklyn.
Then I became a certified personal trainer and started seeing clients – it semi worked because if it was during the day then Leah was home and that didn’t work and nighttime was the only time Asaf and I had to spend together. Which didn’t work for us.
Mom Guilt
Then we moved to Long Island and I still didn’t know what to do. Fast forward to when I started coaching and I started getting busier.
The mom guilt started to build up again
Am I being a good mom while working?
Am I being selfish building up a career I ️ and sometimes taking away from family time (building businesses get messy). And the questions and doubts kept building
- I can’t be a mom and have a career.
- I’m going to miss something as a mom.
- I’m not going to be a good mom or wife
So I slowed down. (Hindsight that was so not the smartest move – but we are all smarter later on)
I slowed down to be that perfect stay at home mom.
I Really Wanted to Grow My Business
But that didn’t make me happy. I really wanted to grow my business – it was something I found that I loved
So…
I sat down with Asaf and at some point, we included Leah in the discussion- that Mommy is going to be working and what that meant.
It meant that because I’m an entrepreneur I can make my own hours – but that sometimes the time will coincide with after school time.
But it also meant that I could travel more and we could do other things too.
We discussed the pros and cons like Pros of being my own boss vs the con of never shutting off fully.
My Own Business
Running my own business is definitely a pro for our family. And myself- I don’t like people telling me what to do.
And I had to shed the illogical mom guilt.
Once I let go of that – I still work on it sometimes – I realized that I’m doing the best for my family by being the best me and doing what I love – I’m still able to juggle and balance it.
It’s still messy sometimes but I love it
In health
Zelda
